How to be Simply Irresistible to Men
By Elise McIntosh
We women have all felt at one point or another a swell of envy when a she-knows-she-is-incredibly-hot seductress enters a room and has all the men stopping mid-sentence and wiping drool from off their chins. It’s the same sort of jealous admiration we have when seeing the ultimate man-eater, Angelina Jolie, whose smirk and pouty lips have an unbelievable effect of sending lustful shivers through our bodies. (Yes, even some of us ladies.) We’ve all wondered: What is about these women that make all in their presence weak in the knees or green with envy?
As a matter of fact, you can, says Ellen T. White. The managing editor of the New York Public Library maintains each one of us has it in us to be irresistible to the opposite sex, no matter what your shape, size, age or personality. “Deep down, we all have the power to attract – to strut, crow, spread our feathers and bring men shuddering to their knees,” she writes in “Simply Irresistible: Unleash Your Inner Siren and Mesmerize Any Man, With Help from the Most Famous and Infamous Women in History” (Running Press, 2007). “The trick is realizing which ‘Siren’ you are and working it confidently.”
A Siren, she explains, is a woman men get excited by – on a sexual level and on other levels, too. In her book, she profiles some of history’s most phenomenal enchantresses, including Cleopatra, Evita Peron, Nicole Kidman and Mae West, to name just a few, and how exactly they were able to make men stop in their tracks and beg for their attention, or mercy, depending on the Siren.
THE FIVE TYPES
Through her extensive research and personal observations, Ms. White identified five basic varieties of Sirens:
Like the mythical Sirens of Homer’s “The Odyssey,” whose angelic voices literally stupefied sailors, each type of Siren has a special “song” that mesmerizes men.
For instance, the ever-elusive Goddess entraps admirers by playing hard to get. The Mother captures a man’s heart through her uncanny ability to provide him with what he needs emotionally, physically, sexually. “Each of these archetypes fulfill some sort of male need or dream,” Ms. White notes. For example, a Competitor awakens a man’s primal desire to conquer or tame; a Companion satisfies the human need to connect.
For those aspiring to be a Siren, it’s important to identify which of the five archetypes you predominantly are and tap into that Siren’s core strengths. You also can borrow a few tricks from the other categories to achieve your purposes. In fact, an intuitive Siren knows how to do this quite well.
There are three key characteristics that all Sirens have.
First, these seductresses have an unwavering confidence in their very special ability to charm men, and it is that kind of attitude that makes them even more appealing.
Second, they absolutely love men and never view them as the enemy.
Finally, they embrace life and make the most of their circumstances, which means they are doers, not complainers.
Despite sharing these key traits, Sirens exude their own brand of charm, or “seductive DNA,” as Ms. White puts it. In fact, it is a Siren’s signature style that sets her apart from the pack and is ultimately what makes her so unforgettable. As Ms. White says, “Being a seductress is not so much a case of pleasing men as it is about being your most attractive self, which, in turn, is irresistible.” Though many of them are gorgeous, “that’s not what being a Siren is about,” adds the author, who purposely selected some plain-looking seductresses to profile in her book to prove sex appeal isn’t necessarily about beauty. “It’s more about force of personality,” she says.
Sirens know exactly how to get what they want, strictly on their terms. “These women are incredibly brave in their lives,” Ms. White remarks. “They do exactly what they want and follow their own sense of what is right for them.”
Ms. White particularly admires the Sirens of the Victorian era, who were not afraid to test the boundaries. “Women weren’t as careful then,” Ms. White notes. “They did really outrageous things.” Like Cora Pearl, a French courtesan who served herself up to her male dinner guests on a massive dish, covered in nothing but icing florettes, a grape in her navel and powdered sugar.
But, that was before the rise of the paparazzi, so “they got away with it,” Ms. White says, noting contemporary Sirens are noticeably more careful. In fact, she feels today’s supersensitive, politically correct environment has, in a way, put a damper on the dynamics between modern-day men and women. “We are too worried about censoring ourselves,” Ms. White gripes, noting it has sort of drained all the fun out of courting rituals.
Often it’s career women who are worried about coming across as “serious” and “professional” who are more shy being flirty toward men. However, she believes it’s more than OK for women to let down their guard, admit they are attracted to men and act from those inner desires.