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What is ‘hardballing?’ My feature with @Today.com explains the benefits of this dating trend that endorses the honest communication of one’s romantic goals and expectations. #hardballing #datingtrend
Joyann writes, “Relationship expert Susan Winter says that “hardballing” is a great way to put your needs first.It’s true that most recent dating terms — like pocketing or ghosting —are cause for concern. But fear not singletons because the latest trending word, “hardballing,” isn’t as bad as it sounds.
What is “hardballing”?
“Hardballing” is a term to explain when you tell someone all of your expectations upfront before you even go out on a first date. That way, you don’t waste your time and can weed out anyone who may not be as serious about a relationship as you are.
Susan Winter, bestselling author and relationship expert of “Breakup Triage: The Cure for Heartache,” describes it as a “no-compromise method of maintaining boundaries and romantic goals.”
Why is it good to “hardball” someone?
According to Winter, “hardballing” can be helpful to give the other person a “clear and definite vision” for your potential future together. It also tells you “exactly what you’re getting” when you choose to date someone.
“Imagine the years of your life you wouldn’t have wasted hoping that somebody would eventually learn to like you enough to be into a relationship with you or dating in the hopes that once they fall in love with you, then they might want to marry you,” Winter said. “And then once they marry you that they may want children. There are so many contingencies in place. I think it’s better to be very honest.”
How exactly do you “hardball” someone?
It’s always best to be as clear as possible. That way, there’s no room for misinterpretation.
“When the individual is clear about why they’re dating and what they want from a partner, it’s very important to be upfront about that. The problem that we have nowadays is vagueness. This is what’s creating ‘situationships’ and ‘friends with benefits,’ and people hanging on in the hopes that something more will develop,” Winter said.
What type of language should you use when you “hardball” someone?
While you don’t want to hurt your date’s feelings, “hardballing” is all about making sure they know exactly what you mean when you outline your plans for the future. A great way to do this is to use “clear cut, thoughtful, tactful and diplomatic language.”
Continue reading: https://www.today.com/tmrw/trending/hardballing-latest-dating-trend-everyone-try-rcna9509#anchor-Whatishardballing
