Many of you have asked how I got started in this field. I’m honored to be featured in VoyagePhoenix, sharing the journey that led me to this career and the insights I gained along the way.
Below is what was asked of me by the staff writers. I encourage you to read the entire article because quite an interesting bit of business to have to write about yourself in detail. What should you include? What should you leave out? What’s too private? What’s not revealing enough…
Want you again share a big thanks of gratitude to the staff that worked with me. I was originally approached weeks before I was able to finish this writing due to other commitments. And the entire staff was very understanding. So thank you all at Voyage Phoenix:
“Today we’d like to introduce you to Susan Winter.
Susan, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
I came to New York as an Opera singer and theatrical actress. Loved the work. Hated the lifestyle. When I’d had my fill of performing, I transitioned to becoming a Corporate Spokesman for over half of the Fortune 500 companies. All that Shakespeare and stage work paid off, as I’d grown extremely comfortable in my communication and presentational skills. That position led me to having my own TV show, ‘Corporate Profiles.’ on Financial News Network (FNN) which is now called CNBC.
The shift that unknowingly led me to my current career as a Bestselling Author and Relationship Expert happened ‘off duty.’ I left Manhattan after a decade of escalating crime and decreased quality of living. I built a home in a remote area an hour outside of the city and far away from the vibrant, diverse lifestyle to which I’d been accustomed. It was there that I fell in love with a much younger man.
In that time and place, our relationship was met with gossip, lies, and derision. The backlash was extreme. I lost friends who wouldn’t be seen with me in public, and my partner lost his family as they shunned him for loving an older woman.
The gossip shared as ‘fact’ was infinitely more exciting than our day-to-day life of living together. The main narrative was that I was a ‘witch’ who’d cast a spell on him. Why else would someone fall in love with an older woman?
Repeating this now seem ridiculous. But it was the reality of my life at that time. I refused to give up the man I loved to satisfy those around me. But I still hadn’t come to the point of understanding why the penalty was so harsh and the treatment so vicious.
I knew enough to realize that reactions of this magnitude don’t happen in a vacuum. Though the emotional, psychological, and reputational suffering was great, I knew there had to be more to this. The level of hatred I received was beyond comprehension. I discovered that in some groups “different” equals bad.
It was at that point that my perspective shifted. I don’t believe that Life is here to torture us for no reason. But what was the purpose? I began by expanding my vision. What about all the other people who’d fallen in love with someone who didn’t look appropriate? What about the same-sex couples, interracial couples, and those from different religions? Hadn’t we all gone through the same hatred in being authentic to ourselves? But more specifically, what about the other age-gap couples? Who was advocating for them? Then the answer to all the pain revealed itself…
‘Older Women/Younger Men; New Options for Love and Romance’ was published in 2000. It quickly became an international bestseller and is still known today as the ‘bible’ for older women and the younger men who love them. And with it came it a torrent of press. The topic was just controversial enough to engage not only the haters, but in time, the defenders.
It was ‘The Today Show’ that first coined the term “Relationship Expert.” I saw it in the chyron that displayed my name with the book’s title. I’ve used that term ever since and now it’s the standard in our industry.
I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
The price I paid to get the information I have today was excruciatingly difficult. I wouldn’t suggest anyone go looking for controversy or injustice. However, if something extreme happens in your life, there is a possibility of alchemy. Turning your pain into others’ liberation is a worthy justification of the suffering that’s been endured.
Can you tell our readers more about what you do and what you think sets you apart from others?
I write, speak, and coach on all aspects of interpersonal relationships. As a dating coach, I’ve helped over 6000+ individual clients find and keep love. As a bestselling author, (Older Women/Younger Men, Allowing Magnificence, and Breakup Triage), I specialize in presenting evolutionary forms of loving partnership and higher thinking. And as a public speaker, I cover the breadth of modern dating issues, relationship challenges, and personal empowerment.
As one of the first to pioneer this field many decades ago, I began by writing for numerous media outlets. Then, I found a faster way to communicate my information was through videos. I posted my first video in 2016. To date, I have over 41 million views and 252 thousand subscribers on YouTube.
I specialize in finding novel solutions to my clients’ problems. If the answers were common place, they would have figured it out for themselves. But so much of today’s dating and mating behavior falls in between the cracks. There’s a vast gray area of vague, confusing actions and inactions, mixed messages, and assumptions. From breakup recovery to age-gap relationships to dating games and red flags— I decode confusing and conflicting behavior. So ultimately, my work involves analyzing human nature while helping my clients establish confidence and peace of mind.
Modern dating is comprised of numerous pitfalls. From online scams to ghosting and breadcrumbing to future faking; new terms are being coined on a regular basis to describe each incarnation of bad dating behavior. What began as an accidental career discovery for me has now become a burgeoning industry.
I’m best known for decoding complex situations and providing unique, actionable guidance that works in the real world. My goal in all I do is to help my clients gain clarity and confidence while eliminating their pain and confusion. And, to find the best possible outcome for all involved.
There are a number of things for which I am proud; I have earned the devotion of my followers, the trust of journalists, and a global audience.
People I’ve never worked with—those who’ve only seen my videos or read my books—send heartfelt letters, cards, and gifts from all over the world. Some even create testimonials on their own. Their generosity is astounding but knowing that my work has truly helped them is my greatest reward.
I have more press than anyone in my industry and none of this was due to my pursuit. Whether it was Oprah finding me when I didn’t even have a website, the BBC, New York Times, or The World Economic Forum… I’ve been blessed with being known as “the most trusted source” for commentary and insight in my field. For that, I am honored.
Unique to my work is the global audience I’ve amassed. Most dating coaches work domestically and may occasionally have a client outside of their country’s border. I have clients all over the world which enables me to utilize the specific dating protocol for each country and religious sect. I recently went to Singapore and had the opportunity of meeting up with my fans there, as well as clients who flew in for sessions from Japan, Taiwan, Indonesia, Myanmar, and India.
Can you share something surprising about yourself?
I was the original voice for all automated business answering systems. I remember spending an entire day recording for AT&T, working on what was then a new and unknown service. Imagine my surprise when, months later, I contacted my insurance company and heard my own voice answering the call.
I became a fantasy action figure for comic books and statues in my late 40’s. I was the body model for Lady Death in Chaos Comics, the Lady in Red for Matrix, and the body/face model for DC Comic’s Knockout; Vertigo as Anita Manaday.